Friday, March 9, 2012
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
off the subject for a minute...............
MY HUBBY GOT A FULL TIME JOB...TODAY AND STARTED TODAY...W/ BENEFITS.....3/11:30PM SHIFT.....AND WILLWORK FOR HARRYS FOR AT LEAST A WK OR TWO....SO HE DONT LEAVE TONY HANG....ITS ALL GOOD...IT TOOK 46 LONG DAMN MONTHS...MY BABY WORKED 25 YEARS FOR A COMPANY AND THEN HE HAD NOTHING....THEN WAS ON UNEMPLOYMENT FOR 6 MONTHS TIL THE DAY HE STARTED TO WORK FOR TONY AT HARRYS BAR AND GRILL AFTER HOURS....FOR 46 LONG MONTHS OF A 3 HOUR JOB 7 DAYS A WK......AND THE PAY WASNT EVEN WORTH IT...BUT WE HAD TO PAY RENT....SO .. I KNOW THAT IF WE SUFFER AND WORK AND LEARN FROM IT....IN THE END SOMETHING WILL COME GOOD OUT OF IT......SO THANKS GOD....WE CAME THRU....NOW WE CAN BREATH.................
Monday, March 5, 2012
QUIET AS A MOUSE.....
WELL I WILL BE MAKING SO SERIOUS CHANGES....TO SIT HERE NOW AND WHAT MY LIFE IS NOW.....I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING....I CANT STAND THAT I LET THIS GO ON....SINCE 2007....I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN ALONE...AS I BEEN THINKING THESE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS...WONDERING HOW IM GOING TO ADDRESS THIS...AND I GOT TO CHANGED QUICKLEY....THAT MEANS...IF I HURT ANYBODY IN THE PROCESS ...WHO CARES....IVE BEEN THE ONE GETTING HURT................SO WHEN IS IT MY TURN AGEE.....STARTING NOW......
I JUST MAY MAKE A MAJOR CHANGE WHERE I WANT TO BE FREE....I DONT HAVE ANY RESPONSIBILITY'S WITH THE TWO OLDEST ADULT CHILDREN.... RIGHT NOW ITS ABOUT MY GUNNY BUTT......AND IF I TAKE THIS ONE STEP.....I WOULD REALLY HATE TO DO THIS...BUT I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE..............
EVERYTHING WAS GOOD UP TIL 2007...AND NOW SINCE THAT YEAR...I HAVE BEEN FEELING SO ALONE...BUT REALLY MAYBE THE YEAR 2000.....I KNOW I TOOK ON A BIG RESPONSIBILITY WHEN I TOOK CARE OF AND MARRIED MY HUSBAND..NOW I REALLY TIRED OF THE WHOLE SITUATION.....HOW DO I SAY THIS..........SO I LIKE TO TAKE CARE OF THINGS...IM IN CONTROL ALWAYS....AND... I HAVE A MAN....THAT HAS TO BE TOLD....WHAT I WANT OR NEED....WHEN IT COMES TO THE HUBBY WIFFEY THING......WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME INITIATING WHAT I NEED.....SO TIRED....YES WERE IN THAT HONEYMOON STAGE FOR LIKE 5 YEARS.....BUT THESE LAST 12 YRS....OMG.....WHY ARE WE OR I LIVING THIS WAY......THIS IS SO OLD...AND WHEN I BRING IT UP TO HIS ATTENTION...........NADA................SHIT....MAYBE SAY THE D WORD......LIKE THAT WILL HAPPEN....UNLESS I REALLY PRESSED THE ISSUE......................WELL I JUST MENTIONED THE D WORD......AS I FIGURE IT AS FAST AS I SAID IT...HE DIDNT COMPREHEND IT...LIKE I KNEW HE WOULDNT.................SO.......MAYBE I WILL BE THINKING MORE TOWARDS THAT.....IN THE MEAN TIME......I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE A FEW DAYS TO MYSELF...AND RE THINK...THINGS...INCLUDING FRIEDNDS AND FAMILY......REALLY.......I NEED TO JUST LET GO AND WALK AWAY..............................GET YOUR FUCKING ASS UP BON BON...AND DO SOMETHING BEFORE ITS TO LATE.......
I JUST MAY MAKE A MAJOR CHANGE WHERE I WANT TO BE FREE....I DONT HAVE ANY RESPONSIBILITY'S WITH THE TWO OLDEST ADULT CHILDREN.... RIGHT NOW ITS ABOUT MY GUNNY BUTT......AND IF I TAKE THIS ONE STEP.....I WOULD REALLY HATE TO DO THIS...BUT I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE..............
EVERYTHING WAS GOOD UP TIL 2007...AND NOW SINCE THAT YEAR...I HAVE BEEN FEELING SO ALONE...BUT REALLY MAYBE THE YEAR 2000.....I KNOW I TOOK ON A BIG RESPONSIBILITY WHEN I TOOK CARE OF AND MARRIED MY HUSBAND..NOW I REALLY TIRED OF THE WHOLE SITUATION.....HOW DO I SAY THIS..........SO I LIKE TO TAKE CARE OF THINGS...IM IN CONTROL ALWAYS....AND... I HAVE A MAN....THAT HAS TO BE TOLD....WHAT I WANT OR NEED....WHEN IT COMES TO THE HUBBY WIFFEY THING......WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME INITIATING WHAT I NEED.....SO TIRED....YES WERE IN THAT HONEYMOON STAGE FOR LIKE 5 YEARS.....BUT THESE LAST 12 YRS....OMG.....WHY ARE WE OR I LIVING THIS WAY......THIS IS SO OLD...AND WHEN I BRING IT UP TO HIS ATTENTION...........NADA................SHIT....MAYBE SAY THE D WORD......LIKE THAT WILL HAPPEN....UNLESS I REALLY PRESSED THE ISSUE......................WELL I JUST MENTIONED THE D WORD......AS I FIGURE IT AS FAST AS I SAID IT...HE DIDNT COMPREHEND IT...LIKE I KNEW HE WOULDNT.................SO.......MAYBE I WILL BE THINKING MORE TOWARDS THAT.....IN THE MEAN TIME......I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE A FEW DAYS TO MYSELF...AND RE THINK...THINGS...INCLUDING FRIEDNDS AND FAMILY......REALLY.......I NEED TO JUST LET GO AND WALK AWAY..............................GET YOUR FUCKING ASS UP BON BON...AND DO SOMETHING BEFORE ITS TO LATE.......
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